Tourism In Fairy Tales – Flash Fiction Story #7

TOURISM IN FAIRY TALES

By Mary Wright (me)

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[red recording symbol appears]

“So, uh, somehow I jumped into this world of fairy tales. And, um, it was good I always bring my camera everywhere, ya know? I, um, I’m not really sure I remember any of the stories, but maybe by being here as a tourist, I, can, ya know, learn them.”

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[start recording]

“I ran into this witch of a lady, holding a basket of apples. Like, ya know, I’m not getting any younger, so I applaud her for being able to pick so many of ‘em. She was going to this ghost skinned lady’s cottage with lots of short men, or so she said. Didn’t know if I should ask about how to get back home, but she looked like she was on a mission, so I let her, uh, go to the place I said.”

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“It’s night now, and I’ve been walking through the forest. It’s really funny. I don’t remember walking that far, but all of a sudden, out of nowhere, ya know? I was at this dance party. Well, there wasn’t any disco or anything, it was more slow and boring, oh. They called that something, didn’t they? Uh, oh, a ball. That’s what it was. This lady in a blue dress, way too long in my opinion, was running down these huge steps that led to the place. She had these clear, really uncomfortable-looking heels on her feet, and she lost one of them on the way down. She was really fast, even while limping, but somehow I caught up to her. I helped her get to her horse-and-buggy, wow, surprised I remember the name of that – anyway, I was a gentleman, and then it was riding quickly away. Saw this guy find the other glass heel on the steps. He looked determined. All I was thinking was, dude, you gotta get more exercise to keep up with that lady!”

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[start recording]

“Morning now. Suddenly. My eyes are hurting pretty bad, and my legs, too. Like I said, not getting younger. Did I say that? If I didn’t, you know that now.  Anyway, even with my head throbbing, I remembered to ask the next person I saw how to get back home, ya know. It’s weird. Feels like I’ve been here a long while. Like, slow motion action movie kind of thing. Anyway. I saw this huge tower, and I was like, if any place was gonna be a kind of portal thing, it was in that tower. So there was this long strand of yellow yarn, really long, and I climbed it like rope, and it turns out it was a lady’s hair! Wonder how long it took her to get that length! Anyways, she said, that if I go to sleep, like, I’ll wake up and be back. That seems too easy. Wouldn’t believe it in a movie, even. But if she says so, it’s gotta be right. Did I mention her hair?”

[silence for a few moments]

[stop recording]

[start recording]

“So, uh, I’m in my bed, uh, with my laptop, ya know? And I’m watching myself with what I recorded. This is really weird. I actually went to Fairy Tale Universe. Unless somehow this is an illusion or hallicunation or the Matrix, ya know. If so, that’d be sooooo cool, man. Anyway. If it was real, I think that’s pretty awesome. Not going to be telling anybody cuz they won’t believe me, obviously, but if any opportunity comes up where they want to see stuff that I’ve recorded on my camera, I’ve got the thing that holds the camera around my neck. The canvas strap, ya know? Yeah. That. Anyway. I’ve gotta go to work now. I’ll try not to be thinking about Fairy Tale Universe, or accidently say something out loud, ya know? Okay. Bye. Yeah.”

[stop recording]

FIN

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